Boop Bop Roast

Yo, Jono Fry walked in,

the Wi-Fi lost its nerve

Even the loading screen said,

“Man, know your worth” (hahaha) Jono’s got a dating profile,

six months out of date His best picture’s blurry,

and the blur still needs a break He sends “hey” at midnight

like it’s groundbreaking art Then gets left on read by a chatbot

with a heart His haircut has a plot twist,

his outfit missed the memo He dresses like he lost a bet

to a discount mannequin,

bro He says he’s got game,

but the game got up and fled Even his mirror turned around

and shook its head Oh,

Jono Fry, what a legendary scene Big talk,

tiny follow-through, confidence on low battery Oh,

Jono Fry, take a bow,

take a seat You bring the awkward energy and somehow miss the

beat (whoops)

He called it “romance,” it was three awkward lines A desperate little

monologue with twelve crying emojis online He tried to play it smooth,

but the smooth got recalled His pickup line arrived already looking appalled

He says, “I’m misunderstood,” like it’s a brand-new excuse No,

Jono, we understood you — that’s the issue,

juice Still, beneath the chaos,

there’s a lovable guy Who could maybe win a date if he

stopped trying so hard to try Oh,

Jono Fry, what a legendary scene Big talk,

tiny follow-through, confidence on low battery Oh,

Jono Fry, take a bow,

take a seat You bring the awkward energy and somehow miss the

beat

So here’s to Jono,

king of the accidental fail May his next conversation last longer than

the “typing…” tale He’s not a lost cause,

just a work in progress,

okay? But somebody hide his phone before he messages again today