Five Steps Fallen
I used to pray for open doors,
now I count the locks at night.
Funny how you beg for altitude then panic at the height.
Back when nothing had my name,
nothing had the strength to leave.
Now I’ve got a life worth losing,
so I finally learned to grieve.
Every win comes with a shadow,
every room could change its mind.
Every number on the screen
looks permanent
until it isn’t.
I thought the top would sound like angels.
It sounds more like my pulse.
I thought success would kill the fear.
It only changed what fear was for.
Don’t look down. Don’t count floors.
Don’t ask what happens if the elevator stops.
Don’t look down. Hold the rail.
Smile like you were born this high.
I know the ground.
I know its taste.
I know exactly what it takes.
So if the sky wants something back,
let it come collect.
I’m still here.
People love you when you’re rising.
They love the story,
love the flame.
But nobody stands beside the ladder when the weather learns your name.
I can hear the old room breathing
through the walls of where I am.
It says, “You know how fast this vanishes.” I say,
“Yeah.
That’s why I can.”
You can lose what you never had.
That never scared me much.
The terror starts when life gets good
and suddenly you care too much.
Don’t look down. Don’t count floors.
Don’t let the distance turn to doubt.
Don’t look down. Hold the rail.
You didn’t climb this far to bow.
I know the ground.
I know its voice.
I’ve heard it make a man feel small.
The difference now? If everything breaks,
I know I can survive the fall.
What if it leaves?
What if it dies?
What if the thing that proves I made it turns out temporary
in disguise?
What if tomorrow
walks in like before?
What if I wake up with the same two hands and nothing
else anymore?
: Good.
Because these are the hands that built it.
Don’t look down— LOOK THROUGH IT.
Let the whole damn skyline shake.
Don’t look down— I KNOW THE BOTTOM.
I have slept where hope goes thin.
If the tower folds tomorrow,
if the lights forget my name,
I’ll come back with bloodied knuckles and build the bastard thing again.
No borrowed courage. No perfect ground.
No promise I won’t hit the floor.
I’m not fearless because I’m high.
I’m fearless because I’ve fallen before.
So go ahead.
Move the ground.