Tommy’s 114 Charges

(spoken) Happy thirteenth birthday,

Tommy! We got you a nice little number for your

cake... One hundred and fourteen!

Tom turned thirteen today,

finally a teen

Proudly wearing the flimsiest success ever seen He thinks they're the greatest,

he thinks they're the best While a massive great asterisk sits on

his chest You’re officially a teenager,

blowing out your cake But just like City's books,

your history is fake!

One hundred fourteen charges,

Tommy, what a stat!

(what a stat!) You can't even blow out your candles to that!

Happy birthday to you,

you're thirteen today And all of your trophies are getting taken away!

You were barely even born when the cooking begun

So don't look at us like you actually won

You boast about Haaland and Pep's golden era While the Premier League

court date keeps getting nearer Enjoy your birthday present,

have a great night Before you're playing Tuesday fixtures in League Two

tonight!

One hundred fourteen charges,

Tommy, what a stat!

(what a stat!) You can't even blow out your candles to that!

Happy birthday to you,

you're thirteen today And all of your trophies are getting taken away! (hahaha!)

Thirteen years old, and a lifetime of blame

One hundred fourteen charges next to your name Happy Birthday,

Tommy! Cheerio, cheerio, bye-bye... (bye-bye!)