Don t Call Me Back

I sleep in borrowed fabric,

smells of bitter grass and smoke

I hold onto a button from

a day that turned to dust

You text me “all is fine,”

and in that period you wrote

A nail drives through a wall

it’s way too narrow for its

rust I learn not to

inquire why the silent pond goes

cold Or why I crack a

smile where a smile should never

be

We each possess a secret rule

we privately uphold And mine is

never naming fear for what it

does to me

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

When thunder turns to silence,

black tea chills before its time

And someone cracks a stupid joke

to keep our eyes awake We

hoard those little punchlines like dry

matches in a line Because the

dark is earnest,

but we’re standing for our sake

I’ve seen the kindest hands

grow numb and heavy with the

weight I’ve seen a heart bolt

shut its doors and throw the

key away I’d wish to say

I’m terrified, but something bars the

gate Stuck deep between the heavy

sky and words I cannot say

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

And if I fall asleep,

don’t wake me suddenly tonight

Let even dreams forget to call

my name across the loam

I will return if I can

return close into your light

And not just as a body

dragging memories back home

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

Don’t call me back just yet,

I’m still here

And if I keep my silence,

it doesn’t mean I’m gone It’s

only winter in my chest learning

how to thaw Don’t call me

back just yet

Please let me carry on

I’m still here

I’m still here

I’m still here