Like A Tractor
Seven in the morning… Come on,
don’t do this.
Man, the whole block heard that!
Turn the key at seven,
hear a tractor in the yard,
Neighbors at the windows looking at me extra hard.
Ain’t a custom muffler,
ain’t a souped-up racing ride,
Just a busted-sounding trumpet with a motor stuck inside.
Got a rattle by the floorboard,
got a rasp around the bend,
Every time I touch the pedal,
here we go again.
Lady down the sidewalk says,
“You waking up the street!” I say,
“Ma’am, I’m just commuting,
that’s the car, it ain’t me!”
Sounds like a tractor!
(BRRRAAAP!) Whole block waking when I pull up out the back!
Sounds like a tractor!
(WHAT’S
THAT?) Ain’t a race car,
man, it’s barely holding intact!
Put-put, pop-pop, rattling the street,
Got an exhaust doing ad-libs over every single beat!
Sounds like a tractor!
(LET IT
GO!) Everybody hears me coming ’fore I even hit the road!
Pull into the parking lot,
somebody yells, “Nice sound!” Then his buddy starts to laughing when I
turn the music down.
Ask me what I’m running,
I say, “Mostly on a prayer,
And a heater blowing hot enough to dry my underwear.” Call a
muffler shop, they tell me,
“Bring it by.” Ask ‘em what it’ll cost,
they say, “Can’t tell till we try.” Got a pocket full of
nothing, got a calendar of bills,
Got an exhaust that thinks it’s famous every time I climb a
hill.
Sounds like a tractor!
(BRRRAAAP!) Whole block waking when I pull up out the back!
Sounds like a tractor!
(WHAT’S THAT?) Ain’t a race car,
man, it’s barely holding intact!
Put-put, pop-pop, rattling the street,
Got an exhaust doing ad-libs over every single beat!
Sounds like a tractor!
(LET IT GO!) Everybody hears me coming ’fore I even hit the
road!
Got a rasp, got a buzz,
got a clank beneath the seat,
Got a neighbor keeping count of every time I leave the street.
Everybody got a theory,
everybody got a fix,
Funny how the free advice don’t pay for any of this.
So I park it in the driveway,
let the engine settle down,
Finally hear some silence,
not a single soul around.
Then the dashboard starts blinking like a carnival at night,
And I swear that little cluster’s trying to pick another fight.
At least the noise stopped.
…Why are there MORE lights now?
Man, it’s Christmas in October.