Release Iteration
“What sprint are we on?” “It’s not a sprint.” “What?”
“Release iteration.”
“So… sprint?” “No.”
Release iteration. Release iteration.
Pick it up — get
it done — put it out
— next one.
“Where are the story points?” Don’t have ’em.
“Velocity?” Don’t know.
“Burndown?” Of what?
No seven.
No thirteen.
No twenty-one.
No arguing whether a
button is a THREE.
Need it?
Do it.
Done?
Ship it.
Broke?
Fix it. Good?
Next bit. “It’s basically a sprint though.” IT’S A RELEASE ITERATION.
“How long is it?” Till release.
“What’s the velocity?” Things get done.
“How many points?” NONE.
“How do you estimate capacity?” LOOK AT THE WORK.
“But how do you know—” WE TALK TO EACH OTHER.
Ticket. Branch. Review. Merge.
Test.
Release. Ticketbranchreviewmergetestrelease. Ticket-branch-review-merge— WAIT.
“What?” “That one's broken.”
“Fix it.” “Done.” “Release.”
“So when does the next sprint start?”
... Mate.
IT'S.
A. RELEASE. ITERATION. No points on the board,
no velocity graph,
no Fibonacci séance
to estimate the task.
We know what we're making.
We know what comes next.
Get the bloody thing working,
then get on with the rest.
“Sprint?” Iteration. “Points?”
No. “Velocity?” No. “Ceremony?” Why?
“Retro?” Sometimes. “Planning?” Obviously.
“Stand-up?” Yeah. “So Agile?” OH FOR—
RELEASE ITERATION
RELEASE ITERATION GET IT DONE
GET IT OUT NEXT
ONE NEXT
ONE NEXT ONE—
“…sprint?” “No.”