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  • Frogs Of The Mersey

    Frogs Of The Mersey

    Froggington

    VOICE 2: Where do the frogs live then?

    VOICE 1: Liverpool.

    VOICE 2: Where in Liverpool?

    VOICE 1: Everywhere, lad.

    VOICE 2: I've never seen one.

    VOICE 1: You've never seen a Liverpool frog?

    VOICE 2: No. VOICE 1: Jesus Christ.

    VOICE 1:

    Under Lime Street.

    Sefton Park.

    Down the docks.

    VOICE 2: They're under Lime Street?

    VOICE

    1: Yeah. VOICE 2: How many?

    VOICE 1: I don't do the census.

    VOICE 2: What about the Liver Birds?

    VOICE 1: What about them?

    VOICE

    2: Do they eat the frogs?

    VOICE 1:

    They're made of copper.

    VOICE 2: So?

    VOICE 1: SO

    THEY DON'T GET HUNGRY.

    VOICE 2: What do the frogs eat?

    VOICE 1: Flies. VOICE 2: Liverpool flies?

    VOICE 1:

    Obviously.

    VOICE

    2: What's different about them?

    VOICE 1: The accent.

    VOICE

    2: Can a frog get the ferry?

    VOICE 1: Course it can.

    VOICE 2: Need a ticket?

    VOICE 1: Depends. VOICE

    2: On what?

    VOICE

    1: Whether it's

    going Birkenhead.

    VOICE 2: Could it swim?

    VOICE 1: Don't be ridiculous.

    VOICE 2: It's a frog.

    VOICE 1: IT'S A BIG RIVER.

    BOTH: WHERE ARE THE FROGS?

    LIVERPOOL!

    WHERE IN LIVERPOOL?

    ALL OVER! CAN THEY CROSS THE MERSEY?

    ON THE FERRY!

    VOICE

    2: Then they're Wirral frogs.

    VOICE 1: No they're not.

    VOICE 2: They're in Birkenhead.

    VOICE

    1: VISITING. VOICE 2: Still reckon they could swim it.

    VOICE

    1: Oh, fuck off.

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