Gary the Seagull

Woke up by the seafood shack Sun was shining on the bay

Found half a breakfast burrito Pretty good start to my day Stole

a fry from some tourist Took a little sip of Coke Buzzed

his brand-new ball cap And left him my best joke You call

me trouble

I call it free

Whatever falls from up here Don’t pin that on me

I’m Gary the Gull I’m wild and I’m free Every beachside picnic

Looks like lunch to me

I’ll steal your fries Then circle your chair If I start wigglin’

You better beware Saw a pretty little gull Strutting circles in the

sand Puffed my chest and worked my wings Like a very handsome

man Brought her half a chicken nugget She took it,

and flew away with Lou

I sighed for seven seconds Then decorated a Subaru

I’ve been chased from patios Run off from the pier

Folks see Gary circling And suddenly disappear

I’m Gary the Gull I’m wild and I’m free Every shiny windshield

Looks like art to me

I’ll raid your picnic Then take to the air If Gary starts

wigglin’

You better beware

Saw a bald guy sunbathing Shining in the sun Told myself to

leave him be Then temptation took over me Caught a breeze and

made my pass Everything was lined up right He jumped up,

his wife laughed I was gone and out of sight He pointed

up and blamed me I gave him one sly eye

Couldn’t say what happened there I was only flying by Well,

some birds build a nest

Some birds mate for life Some sing little love songs Trying to

find a wife

Gary steals your French fries Gary shakes his tail Leaves a little

parting gift Then catches that next gale French fry?

Mine.

Corn dog? Mine.

Nachos? Definitely mine.

Freshly washed convertible?

Ohhhh… You might wanna move.

I’m Gary the Gull I’m wild and I’m free

Every beachside picnic Looks like lunch to me

I’ll steal your fries Then circle your chair If Gary starts wigglin’

You better beware Hey… Is that lady carrying nachos?

…Gary’s back on duty.