awake in motion

Something weird happened this morning.

Nothing dramatic.

Nobody called.

Coffee tasted like coffee.

Sun came through the blinds.

That was all.

Then I caught myself checking a date For something three months from

now.

Put it in my calendar without thinking— Then stared at what I'd

just written down.

Three months from now?

That's new.

I went to sleep without a future,

Woke up wanting something again.

Don't know who turned the lights back on,

Don't know exactly when.

Yesterday was just another yesterday— Today I caught myself wondering when.

I went to sleep without a future,

Woke up wanting something again.

For a long time I quit looking ahead.

Not because I was sad every day.

You can get surprisingly good at existing When tomorrow doesn't have much

to say.

You eat. You work.

You pay what's due.

Laugh sometimes. Go home.

Repeat.

Then one stupid little idea shows up And suddenly won't let you

sleep.

I started researching something at midnight.

Why the hell do I

care this much?

Oh. Oh, shit.

I went to sleep without a future,

Woke up wanting something again.

Not some giant revelation,

Just a reason to see where something ends.

And now one idea became another,

And another showed up behind that one—

I don't know what the fuck is happening,

But apparently I'm not done.

Don't call it a comeback.

I didn't go anywhere.

Don't tell me I found myself.

I was right fucking here.

I just stopped expecting anything

Long enough to forget what wanting felt like.

Then wanting came looking for me.

Maybe that's the strangest part:

Nothing outside changed that much.

Same room.

Same name. Same life.

Different pulse.

I went to sleep without a future,

Woke up wanting something again.

Now I'm making room for things I haven't even imagined yet.

I don't need to know where this is going.

I don't need to name it yet.

I went to sleep without a future— Woke up...

...wanting something again.