Extra! Extra! Sing Along

Extra, extra, read all about it!

There's a shiny piece of glass in your hand,

But it doesn't have a soul or a band.

It can calculate your route in a flash,

But it cannot match

my ink and my dash! (hahaha)

Oh, I'm the paper in your pocket,

I'm the headline today,

No batteries required to make me play!

Your fancy little screens might glow in the dark,

But they'll never have my historical spark!

Your smart assistant has a voice dry as ice,

Giving cold, robotic, mechanical advice.

I've got crosswords and cartoons and the local town gossip,

And if you drop me on the floor,

well, I don't ever chip! (whoops)

They update their system

every single night, While I stay exactly the same in black and

white! No passwords, no pop-ups,

no signal to lose,

Just the smell of fresh ink and the afternoon news!

Oh, I'm the paper in your pocket,

I'm the headline today,

No batteries required to make me play!

Your fancy little screens might glow in the dark,

But they'll never have my historical spark!

So fold me up,

take me home And put down that phone! (ahhhh)