Skankin’ Lifeguard Dreams

(wheeeew!) I got the whistle,

I got the cream,

I got the elevated chair.

Thirty centimeters of crystal water under my care.

Nobody's ever drowned on my watch,

nobody ever could — but that's not the point,

that's not the point,

I'd save them if I should!

Kiddie pool! (He's on duty!) Kiddie pool!

(Eyes on the water!) No running!

No diving! No dying on my watch!

The ocean called me once.

I let it go to voicemail.

Somebody's armband needed inflating.

Somebody always does.

Kiddie pool!

(He's on duty!) Kiddie pool!

Depth is not the measure of a sea.

Responsibility is.