Still Becoming

Fourteen years old,

A heart full of questions,

A head full of noise,

I’m fourteen and I’m tired of pretending,

Saying “I’m fine” when my head won’t stop spinning.

Everybody thinks they know who I am,

But I don’t even know myself yet,

damn.

My friends are changing,

I’m changing too,

Some days I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.

I laugh in the hallway,

then go home and hide,

Trying to figure out what’s going on inside.

And nobody tells you growing up can hurt,

Nobody warns you you’ll question your worth.

I’m only fourteen, but it feels like forever,

Trying to hold myself together.

I’m scared of tomorrow,

stuck in today, Trying to find the words I’m too afraid to

say.

Maybe I’m not broken,

maybe I’m just growing,

Maybe there’s a version of me I don’t know yet.

There’s pressure in my phone,

pressure in my grades,

Pressure to look perfect in a world full of fake.

Everybody’s posting like they’ve got it all planned,

While I’m sitting in my room just staring at my hands.

I don’t have to know

who I’m gonna be,

I just have to keep being me.

I’m only fourteen, and that’s enough for now,

I’m still figuring it out somehow.