I LIKE TO FART

(woooh! yeah!) Some people like dancing,

Some people like art,

Some people collect little stamps,

But I just like to fart.

I fart in the morning,

I fart late at night,

I fart when I’m sitting down,

I fart when I’m upright.

Sometimes it’s a tiny pfft,

Sometimes it shakes the floor,

Sometimes I think it’s finished— Then out comes one fart more!

’Cause I like to fart!

Yeah, I like to fart!

It’s coming from my bottom But it’s coming from my heart.

I like to fart!

It’s my favorite kind of sound,

A little bit of thunder From the basement underground.

I fart inside the kitchen,

I fart behind the door,

I fart inside an elevator— Then blame it on the floor.

I fart when no one’s looking,

I fart when people stare,

And when they ask,

“Who did that?” I point somewhere over there.

Some are long and musical,

Some are short and sweet,

Some sound like a motorcycle Trying hard to start its beat.

’Cause I like to fart!

Yeah, I like to fart!

It’s coming from my bottom But it’s coming from my heart.

I like to fart!

Let the whole world know,

If my belly starts a-rumbling,

Then it’s time to let it go!

Beans for breakfast, Cabbage at noon,

Give me some broccoli— I’ll be playing a tune.

Left cheek!

Right cheek! Give me

a start!

Everybody clap your hands—

I’m about to fart!

Pfffft…

Was that me?

BRRRRRT! Probably.

I LIKE TO

FART!

And I’m proud of my art!

Every little trumpet blast Is a masterpiece from the heart.

I LIKE TO FART!

Till the day I depart,

You can keep your fancy hobbies— I JUST REALLY LIKE TO FART!

…Wait.

That one wasn’t a fart.