Buck Tooth Beat

Buck tooth, ugly, hairy as can be,

Walkin’ through the woods like a wild chimpanzee,

Smell like a couch that’s been left in the rain,

Everybody clears out when I’m comin’ down the lane.

Pickin’ blackberries, scratchin’ up my arms,

Lookin’ like I wandered off from a barn,

Hair on my shoulders,

hair on my back,

I got so much fuzz,

I could sleep in a sack!

I’m buck tooth and hairy,

yeah, that’s me! Ugly as a stump on an old dead tree!

Smellin’ like a couch and a blackberry patch,

Got more hair than a bear in a lumberjack hat!

Buck tooth and hairy,

don’t stare too long,

I’m a backwoods creature with my own theme song!

People say, “Buddy, what happened to you?” I said,

“Nothin’—this is just what I do!” I rolled outta bed and I

scared myself, Looked in the mirror and blamed somebody else!

Long hair swingin’ when I walk down the street,

Hairy little legs and some questionable feet,

My deodorant quit and my comb broke too,

But I’m still out here doin’ what I gotta do!

I’m buck tooth and hairy,

yeah, that’s me! Ugly as a stump on an old dead tree!

Smellin’ like a couch and a blackberry patch,

Got more hair than a bear in a lumberjack hat!

Buck tooth and hairy,

proud as can be,

If ugly was a contest,

I’d win first, second,

and three!

Don’t need no barber,

don’t need no shave,

I’m lookin’ like Bigfoot escaped from a cave!

Everybody runs when they see me appear,

I just grin with my buck teeth and yell,

“GET OVER HERE!” (hahaha)

Buck tooth and hairy,

wild and free! A hairy backwoods legend—that’s what I’ll be!

Smell like a couch,

smell like the trees,

Got blackberry stains on my dirty jeans!

Yeah, buck tooth and hairy,

that’s my decree— If you don’t like the smell,

don’t stand next to me!