The Shadow in the Room

{warm intimate felt piano chords,

quiet

atmospheric pad}

I wake before the morning light,

my heart is racing for no reason

why.

The room is quiet,

nothing's wrong, but somehow I have felt it all along.

I make my coffee,

tie my shoes, put on the face I always use.

I close the door and step outside,

and take the shadow for another ride.

No one can see it

walking next to me,

no one can hear what

never lets me be.

{subtle bass swells and soft ticking clock rhythm}

There's a shadow in the room,

even when I'm there alone.

It follows every step I take,

turns every whisper into stone.

I tell them all that I'm alright,

I smile and say I'm doing fine.

But there's a shadow in the room,

and every day it looks like mine.

Some days the smallest things feel steep,

getting dressed or finding something good to eat.

The phone lights up,

I let it ring,

I don't have strength to answer anything.

And then at night when lights go low,

my mind begins the loudest show.

A racing heart, a tightening chest,

my body fighting something that does not exist.

I know there's nothing

standing at my door,

but try explaining that when you're on the floor.

{swelling strings and filter sweep} There's a shadow in the room,

even when I'm there alone.

It follows every step I take,

turns every whisper into stone.

I tell them all that I'm alright,

I smile and say I'm doing fine.

But there's a shadow in the room,

and every day it looks like mine.

I don't need someone to fix me,

I don't need a perfect line.

Just sit beside me for a minute,

when I cannot quiet my mind.

And if tomorrow feels no lighter,

if the clouds refuse to move,

I'll count the hours,

breathe a little,

and somehow make it through.

There's a shadow in the room,

but tonight I'm not alone.

It may follow every step I take,

but it doesn't own the road.

I don't have to say I'm alright,

I don't have to hide this time.

There's a shadow in the room,

but the

shadow isn't all that's mine.

Maybe morning comes in slowly,

maybe that's enough tonight.

{instruments fade} The shadow's still here with me,

but so am I.

(so am

I) {cold end}