Paused Engine

{quiet room hum, tape hiss,

dim lights} Look, at 2 AM,

the gloss

wears off.

Anáil nathrach, ortha bháis is beatha,

do chéal déanaimh...

Two in the morning,

staring at the ceiling paint,

Trying to keep the rhythm when the energy is faint.

The coffee cup is empty and the thoughts are spinning loud,

Just trying to find a voice that doesn't mimic the crowd.

Amara vara mara vara vara...

Dohaeris to the quiet,

to the shadows on the wall,

Catching every broken piece before I let it fall.

A soft, sleepy *meaw meaw meaw*

curled up on the bedroom floor.

¡Cuídate!

Let it break if it has to break!

I hate that I hate me,

y luego I love that I hate me,

I hate that I love me,

¡y qué cansada está this body!

Saying something real, moving like a midnight ghost,

Not fitting the box they built,

missing the mark the most!

How do I build a life in a game where I break

the rules?

Scared of running out of safety,

cornered by social tools!

Anáil nathrach! Amara vara mara!

Apeiron, chaos, the void staring back at the glass,

Knowing that every heavy night is gonna pass!

*Meaw meaw meaw* in a soft,

late-night hum, While the rest of the world is quiet and numb.

{beat drops out, string slides,

deep breath}

If nothing matters tonight,

then the song belongs to us,

We don't need a crown,

we just need a place to trust.

Creando un santuario out of my own gentleness and grace,

Because the night is heavy,

but we earned this space.

Anáil nathrach, ortha bháis is beatha,

do chéal déanaimh. Amara vara mara vara

vara.

Dohaeris.

Meaw meaw meaw...

resting back in the dark,

breathing easy.